Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Gators vs. Bears, Tensions Mounting
A war is brewing. The bears of this land may no longer be the dominant creatures in the wilds of North America. Alligators are moving north, pushing further into the territory of the mighty bear. Thousands of bears will soon make a stand in an effort to battle off the land hungry gators.
The following is a link to shocking Bear on Gator Violence filmed by tourist and model train collector Juan Choochuez from Mexico on vacation with his family in south Georgia (right click and open in new window).
SHOCKINGLY REAL GATOR ATTACK ON BEAR FOOTAGE!
Tensions flared over the weekend as a plot to kidnap and eat a new born panda from the Atlanta Zoo had been discovered and foiled. The gators responsible for this unsettling caper are now "being processed", officials said.
One gator was spotted (picture below) recently with an informant for the Gator Resistance wedged firmly in his jaws at Lake Eufaula, Alabama. The informant's family was notified and subsequently eaten by the bears bearing the sad news. "They seemed weak after we broke the news about the attack to her family. They froze, we attacked. Instinct is instinct and we have no remorse", said Pooh Bear on Tuesday. It seems they were trying to send a message to the Gators in the area.
That message? "Don't mess with us, we're still bears."
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Lake Eufaula, Alabama
The following is a link to shocking Bear on Gator Violence filmed by tourist and model train collector Juan Choochuez from Mexico on vacation with his family in south Georgia (right click and open in new window).
SHOCKINGLY REAL GATOR ATTACK ON BEAR FOOTAGE!
Tensions flared over the weekend as a plot to kidnap and eat a new born panda from the Atlanta Zoo had been discovered and foiled. The gators responsible for this unsettling caper are now "being processed", officials said.
One gator was spotted (picture below) recently with an informant for the Gator Resistance wedged firmly in his jaws at Lake Eufaula, Alabama. The informant's family was notified and subsequently eaten by the bears bearing the sad news. "They seemed weak after we broke the news about the attack to her family. They froze, we attacked. Instinct is instinct and we have no remorse", said Pooh Bear on Tuesday. It seems they were trying to send a message to the Gators in the area.
That message? "Don't mess with us, we're still bears."
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Lake Eufaula, Alabama
"Come for the Recreation, Stay for the Medical Care!"
* Go Skiing!
* Go Boating!
* Go Fishing!
* Only a 25% Possibility of Gator Attacks!
* Go Skiing!
* Go Boating!
* Go Fishing!
* Only a 25% Possibility of Gator Attacks!
Monday, August 18, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Fly Delta.
On our way up to Atlanta, Helen and I stopped in at the MINI dealership to see what they had on the lot. We found this marketing wonder in the back waiting for service.
Friday, August 8, 2008
NEW OFFICE POLICY
EFFECTIVE AUGUST 11, 2008
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing PRADA shoes and carrying a
Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing
you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every
effort should be made to have non-employees attend the
funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where
employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be
scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and
subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing PRADA shoes and carrying a
Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing
you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every
effort should be made to have non-employees attend the
funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where
employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be
scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and
subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
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